Children come into families in different ways – some by caeserian section, some by natural birth and some through adoption. In our case its been adoption.
After trying to conceive for several years, going through numerous tests and procedures without any positive outcome we decided it was time to investigate adoption. Before we got married, while going through a premarital course we discussed how we would handle infertility and decided then already that we would definitely keep adoption open as an option if it gets to that. We even went as far as to say that even if we were to have our own biological children we would still like to adopt “one day”.
December 2009 we were finally faced with one of the biggest decisions of our lives so far – to stop fertility treatment and pursue adoption or carry on with the hope that we might conceive someday. During our December vacation we both read the book “Adopted for Life” by Russell Moore. This might have been the most important book that focused our efforts and energy into the adoption process.
Back home after our holidays we started finding out about the process and the various options. In the end we decided to go with a private social worker as it was common knowledge that this route was by far the easiest and least tedious. But still little did we know about all the paperwork, home studies, police clearance, family interviews etc etc.
By June that year our profile was ready and all the paperwork done – we were ready to be “paper pregnant”! A few weeks later my mom phoned me about a friend of their neighbour that knew about a young girl that was pregnant. Due to her circumstances she was unable to keep her baby.
Would we send our profile to them? This wasn’t the first time we would hear about a situation like this. So we actually didn’t give too much thought to it but did forward our profile.
3 weeks later I got a phone call on a winter’s afternoon. It was the pregnant girl’s sister saying that her sister wanted us to adopt her baby if we still wanted to! Wow! I had to pinch mysef and relive the conversation a few times before I realised that this was really happening!!
A week later our social worker flew down from Cape Town and we all arranged to meet at O.R. Tambo Airport. The emotions were surreal. What would she look like? What will she think when she meets us? Will she change her mind?! Finally the day arrived and we went to the airport. I spotted her immediately in the Spur and my first thoughts were – Beautiful!! She had big blue eyes, porcelain white skin and a shy smile. The meeting went well and we arranged to go with her to the next gynaecologist appointment. There we met our beautiful daughter for the first time on the sonar screen! The next few weeks would be characterized by an emotional rollercoaster ride! Excitement mixed with anxious thoughts – was this really happening?!
Finally the big day – 7 October 2010 – arrived! What a strange mix of emotions… We left our home early to avoid the traffic to Johannesburg – we couldn’t be late for the birth of our daughter!! We met our biological mom and her sister in the labour ward and had a special time together, exchanging gifts. Nina’s biological mom made her a quilt with her date of birth on it. We treasure it and keep it safe to give it to Nina at the right time as part of her special story.
Just after 8am our perfect gift was delivered by c/section! I was in the theatre along with our very brave biological mom’s sister. After the paediatrician checked her, he handed her to me and I could hold my daughter for the first time! A true heart-stopping moment!! I was admitted to the labour ward with Nina and was her mommy from her first breath! I will always thank and praise our Lord for this incredible privilege! After 2 days we were all discharged and it was time to say goodbye. It was sad to greet everyone, but our hearts were full!
Now Nina is 3 1/2! She is a joy – exuberant, full of life, laughter and adventure! I truly hope that one day I will be able to tell her in as much detail as possible about the brave, selfless act of love her “tummy-mommy” did by entrusting her into our care! We thank God our Father for the special privilege He has given us to experience the joy of parenthood and the wonder of adoption!